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| www.myspace.com/aznandrewboy.
add me.
If people are still on Xanga and are amazed that I have wrote another/last entry, its because I figured out my password..
it took 6 months..but yeah..
AIM: Itsbruce1337 | | |
| I recently returned from my new beachhouse, I took a few pictures.
What would a 3 story beachhouse be....without a private beach?
Sweet fog action
Beach population 3, at the moment ( Its hard to see but two people are walking their dogs to the right)
And thats it..
Have a good spring break everyone. | | |
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This isn't a funny post, just an angry one. I am angry. Notice the Pulp Fiction theme song, a.k.a Dick Dale's misirlou.
When reading this, think Samuel Jackson.
As many of you know, Valentine's day is here. Valentine's day is the lamest 'holiday' of all. If Valentine's day were an animal, it would be a musquito (or mosquito as you all were so quick to point out. Excuse my wrong spelling for 'mosquito' for the rest of this post. I'm too lazy to go and change it all). I hate musquitoes. Every summer, I slaughter them by the thousands. And I enjoy it. Musquitoes are probably the most pointless member of the animal kingdom. They don't do anything productive. They just suck your blood, make you itch, and piss you off. If tomorrow all the world's musquitoes were to die a horrible death, I would hold a 3 week drunken fest for myself and 500 of my closest friends. It would be great. Same holds for Valentine's Day.
In previous Valentine's days, I've always been a single guy. I'd go about living my life, but I was constantly being bombarded by bullcrap Valentine's day advertisements.
"BUY HER LINGERIE OR SHE WON'T LOVE YOU!" (or "buy yourself lingerie or I won't love you"; that's a bit more realistic)
"IF YOU FORGET VALENTINE'S DAY, YOU'LL NEVER GET ANY SEX AGAIN!"
"GIVE HER WHAT SHE'S ALWAYS WANTED ON THE MOST MAGICAL DAY OF THE YEAR!"
"FATTEN UP YOUR GIRLFRIEND WITH OUR $80 GOURMET CHOCOLATES! ALSO BUY HER SOME FLOWERS THAT SHE WILL THROW AWAY HOURS AFTER YOU GIVE THEM TO HER!"
Screw that crap. First of all, the advertisements piss off all the single people. For someone who was single and has no need to celebrate Valentine's day, these advertisements always made me want to make a giant bonfire out of Hallmark cards and candy hearts. The ads make all the single people get depressed. They have no one to share this 'most magical day of the year' with. While they sit at home playing Super Nintendo and eating packet after packet of ramen noodles, everyone else is out exchanging gifts and making sweet, sweet love. Valentine's day is cruel to the poor single people out there.
This year, there is a pretty good chance that I won't be single for Valentine's day. Barring the event that I get tanked one night and find myself locked in a bedroom with seven hot and horny Swedish lesbians and then proceed to give each and every one of them the legendary Andrew Svalesen porksword (which would be freakin' awesome, though I don't know if I would have the stamina)
For couples, this is the holy grail of days. The girls take it so dang seriously. If you provide her with a great Valentine's day, she will love you like never before. If you screw up on Valentine's day, you're pretty much guaranteed to be single the next day. Once again, forget that crap. Who designated Valentine's day to be the one day you can truly express your love? Hallmark. If I love someone and I want to express how I feel for them, I'm going to express it when I want to express it. I don't need Hallmark telling me when to show my feelings. In fact, I think gestures on Valentine's day often mean less. You are OBLIGATED to show your 'love' on Valentine's day. You really have no choice. What means more to you ladies? When the guy is FORCED to buy you meaningless material possessions on Valentine's Day, or when he sweetly surprises you when you least expect it? Maybe I'm wrong, but if my girlfriend surprised me one day by buying me a new hat or a car, I would be much more appreciative than if I got these items on Valentine's day. You expect gifts on Valentine's Day, so when you receive them, they are expected and mean less.
In conclusion, Valentine's Day is B.S. However, since I am sure to be whipped, when the actual day rolls around I will still probably end up doing something special for my girlfriend since I don't want to die a slow and painful death. I hate Valentine's Day.
I wish I had a girlfriend... | | |
| The reason why I don't play xbox live anymore.
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-7153152098207965240
The game you see is Tom Clancy's Rainbox Six 3 : black arrow
A sequel to the best game on xbox (in my opinion)
This kid is 9 years old.
other
http://www.spikedhumor.com/Article.aspx?id=2242
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| I'm back! ( notice the music?)
So I decided, maybe its not quite time to part with me xanga. If you read this, comment right now... So that I know that people will still read this bad boy.
Enjoy.
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50 Cent is taking over. The guy came out of nowhere and quickly took over the music scene with both of his amazingly successful CDs. Now he has a movie out, a video game in which he goes around rocking in his bulletproof vest, the highly respectable G-Unit clothing line, and more. I thought that there was enough 50 around these days, but I was wrong. As I was out to lunch grabbing a sub, I saw something that caught my eye. It was a bottle of mineral water with an interesting label design. I took a closer look and saw a label that read "Formula 50, 50 Cent's mineral water of choice" or some BS like that.
 Formula 50 is for wankstas
Since when has any figure in the history of mankind been rich, powerful, and famous enough to have their own line of bottled mineral water? Even Jesus doesn't have his own line of bottled mineral water. Jesus may have the edge on 50 when it comes to movies, but I have yet to see a video game where Jesus floats around in his temptation-proof robes healing the sick, resurrecting the dead, and converting nonbelievers.
 One of the many problems that could arise making a Jesus video game
Actually now that I think about it, a Jesus video game would be pretty sweet. You start the game as lowly baby Jesus, but by performing miracles and holy feats, you gain EXP and level up, battling Romans, nonbelievers, demons, and corrupt high priests along the way. If the battle gets too tough, just recruit a few disciples during your travels to join your party, but watch out! Choose your allies carefully, or you might get betrayed for a sack of precious silver. If you get crucified and die, it's all good. Rather than restart the game, you can just rise from the dead and resume playing where you left off. You travel around with your party gaining EXP until you eventually become a level 87 Jesus Christ Superstar and battle final boss Satan in a glorious duel of musical prowess. Rather than exchange blows or magic spells, you exchange guitar solos. Satan will shred some sick metal solos, but Jesus' heartwarming Christian rock riffs will be tough to top, even by the devil himself. Who needs World of Warcraft when you have Jesus of Nazareth? If anyone from Blizzard reads this post, begin working on this game immediately.
Caption this picture
Back to 50 Cent. I can see his appeal. 50 is buff, has survived multiple gunshot wounds, has done the whole classic rags to riches thing, and is pretty much a badass. But it seems to me like everyone is getting carried away with 50 Cent. No one that I can think of other than the Beatles has ever been as successful in the music, film, video game, and clothing industry as 50 Cent. Looking at all the facts, what is the one determining factor that's made 50 as famous as he is?
Wow...cool, he's survived multiple gunshots. If that's all it takes to become famous, then I should be the lord of the universe after all of the bullets I've had to remove from my body. I guess surviving multiple gunshots is NOT the key to success.
 
(not really)
Sheeh, not only have I survived bullet wounds, but I've survived lightsaber battles. I'm like 50 Cent times 100. 50 bucks will fill up your gas tank. 50 cents gets you what? Half a stick of gum?
50 is pretty buff. So is Arnold Schwarzenegger, but until he records a "Get to tha choppah!" music video, I'll have a hard time taking the Governator seriously.
Not exactly sure what this picture is, but I think Ahhnold is telling you to get to tha choppah, or he will punch a pepperoni through your head
Could it be the rags to riches angle? Bill Gates did the whole rags to riches thing, but I'm not anticipating anyone to wear any hip Bill Gates clothing or to rep their vintage Windows '98 sneakers anytime in the near future.
 Bill Gates? In prison? You know what that means. Time for a new clothing line. Such a gansta'
I guess the combination of all of these elements is what has made 50 Cent as powerful and untouchable as he is right now. But his own bottled mineral water. I don't know what you been drinkin' or what you been thinkin' 50, but you stepped outta line, boy. No one deserves to have their own mineral water. I lay yo butt down. | | |
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